My husband Jim and I were very excited about the wedding of our niece Sarah. But when she shocked everyone by asking for $5,000, everything changed.
Sarah’s letter came out of the blue and had a scary message inside: “Pay for my vacation with my fiancé.” I think you should have enough saved after years of getting cheap gifts. We were yelled at.
We were saddened as we thought about all the ways we had helped her over the years, like giving her money, family heirlooms, quilts we had made, and help with her first car. The letter was so rude that it made people angry and hurt.
Jim and I chose to get together all of the gifts we had given Sarah. Even though it hurt, it had to be done. We gathered blankets, jewellery, photos, and other items that held memories.
I packed the jewels with a heavy heart, remembering better times. We stopped paying for her wedding and sent her a farewell letter:
“Hi Sarah,
It hurts that you don’t value and respect me. Love isn’t about giving money; it’s about being thankful and humble. We hope that this hard time helps you grow.
“Love, Grandma and Grandpa”
Quickly, the results came. Sarah called us angry and said we ruined her life. “Love isn’t about meeting demands; it’s about making you better,” I said calmly. Learn to be thankful and respectful.
We stand strong, even though her anger hurt. Some family members didn’t agree with our choice, but others did. One cousin told her, “You made the right choice.” “She needed to learn.”
Jim and I are still determined to teach Sarah important things. Love doesn’t mean giving in to every whim; it means helping someone grow.
